Cold-Blooded Kindness

What? Cold-blooded kindness? How does that work? I mean, it’s a contradiction, no?

A contradiction it may be, but some people use kindness to further their cold-blooded agenda. Caring is sometimes a mask for darker motives. One does not need to be a psychopath even a sociopath. Ordinary people may disguise the darkness in their soul with a thin veneer of niceness. I’m old, so I’ve seen a lot of that sort of thing. There’e even a book dedicated to the concept of cold-blooded kindness.

Take this exquisite example (It’s original, not from the book by the same name).

A middle aged woman decides to throw a surprise birthday party for her older sister, whose birthday is near. The younger sister contacts the older sister’s husband to propose the party. The husband thinks it’s a great idea.

OK, says the sister. Can you get me a list of her friends so I can send them invitations? Within a few days the husband has the guest list with contact information and sends it to sister. Husband also agrees to bring his wife to the location of the surprise party under the pretense to taking her out to dinner.

Sister organizes the party, rents a room at a restaurant specializing in such occasions. Sister pays for the whole thing. Wow, what a nice thing to do! It’s sibling love on display.

Wife is surprised, of course. She makes every attempt to have a good time with all of her friends, about 15 couples. Husband notices wife is slightly disturbed. Friends have a good time, and don’t pick up on wife’s slight disenchantment.

At  first, husband isn’t sure what the problem is. Then it hits him. Wham! Why didn’t I see through this sham, he says to himself.

Later, wife confirms to husband what she detected immediately and he didn’t. But he knows wife’s family quite well. He knows younger sister has never been successful at finding her own friends. People just don’t warm up to her for some reason. Sibling rivalry was constant in the sisters’ family home because while older sister had a big stable of friends, younger sister had few and almost none that were true soulmates.

Jealousy and resentment were rampant in those days. The surprise birthday party was little more than an opportunity for younger sister to grandstand, and obtain the contact information of older sister’s friends.

Later, younger sister began contacting sister’s friends and getting herself included in activities with older sister and her friends.

Older sister is devastated. She always subscribed to the theory that friends are God’s apology for relatives. Older sister had carefully kept her family of friends separate from her given family. Now, in one fell swoop, the two become mixed.

Older sister beseeched younger sister to leave her friends alone, told younger sister to find her own friends. Younger sister responded with, “Nobody owns friends. You must be crazy.”

The surprise party was a perfect example of cold-blooded kindness. The destruction and heartache that was inflicted on the older sister by younger sister’s grandstanding under the guise of caring, was substantial and irreparable.


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